Self-compassion is a more effective motivator than self-criticism because its driving force is love, not fear.

– Kristin Neff

A pioneer in self-compassion, Dr. Kristin Neff has researched this trait for over 20 years. In her most recent book, Fierce Self-Compassion, she discusses the duality of self-compassion as equal parts tenderness and fierceness.

Self-compassion extends kindness and understanding to oneself in situations of perceived inadequacy, failure, or general suffering. Self-compassion is positive, rewarding, and intrinsically energizing. By opening our hearts, we open up to an infinite abundance of compassion. The more it flows inward, the more it can flow outward, explains Neff.

Tender self-compassion helps us to be kind and gentle to ourselves. It guides us to the realization that we are only human, that we are bound to make mistakes, to encounter failure and setbacks.