Living In Gratitude: Giving Thanks

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I am grateful for what I am and have. My thanksgiving is perpetual. ~Henry David Thoreau

With Thanksgiving just a few days away, it is the perfect time to talk about giving thanks. After all, that is what this day is all about: gathering with those we care about, sharing a feast and expressing gratitude for our abundance.

Each year brings a cornucopia of things into each of our lives: challenges, changes, adventures, opportunities, losses, renewals, laughter, sadness, lessons and stresses.

It is always easier to appreciate the obvious positives – a promotion, wedding, graduation or birth – but many of us do find ourselves lacking when it comes to being thankful for life’s hardships, losses and even day to day irritations.

Yet gratitude isn’t only about being thankful when things are good but about finding the blessings in all things.

Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation. ~Brian Tracy

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Living In Gratitude: 8 Ways to Stop Worrying

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Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow. ~Swedish Proverb

Our imaginations are such an incredible gift, allowing us to daydream and envision incredible wonder.

As children, we used our vivid imaginations to create fun and exciting playmates and spectacularly fantastical situations in which we would ‘live’ for hours on end. Imagination was fun, funny and adventurous.

As adults, our imaginations often become a work-thing of worry.

We fret tirelessly over horrible situations our imagination dreams up, things that could happen, might happen, but most likely won’t happen. These worries drain us of our productivity, create undue stress, affect our sleep and our relationships.

Worrying is like sitting in a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn’t get your anywhere. ~English proverb

Here are a few healthy habits that can help minimize worrying.

1. Realize most of what we spend time worrying about never comes to fruition

And if it does, we generally have spent hours stewing over a much worse outcome.

As Winston Churchill once said, “When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened.”

When we find ourselves worrying, we should ask:

“How many the things I feared would happen in my life actually did occur?”

By answering this question, we put things into perspective. We frequently find that the majority of our worries never came to light or were considerably less worrisome than we envisioned them to be.

2. Avoid getting lost in vague fears

We can easily work ourselves up over nothing when we let our imagination run wild when we lack clarity in a situation. Vague fears can lead to over-exaggerated scenarios. Gain clarity on the situation by taking deep breath and asking, “What is really the worst that could happen?” Then, spend some time identifying a solution should that unlikely scenario occur. This practice saves time, energy and a lot of suffering. Read more

Living In Gratitude: 6 Tips To Composing Heartfelt Thank You Notes

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Saying thank you is more than good manners.  It is good spirituality.  ~Alfred Painter

People like being appreciated. Every gift deserves a thank-you, whether it is a material object, a referral, or to express your appreciation for someone’s friendship, acceptance or support.

Although occasionally a thank you email or text message will do, a handwritten note expresses a completely different level of appreciation. It takes added effort and planning (but not much) to actually pen and mail a thank you card, letter or postcard. Even if your handwriting is poor, still hand-write your notes. Do not type them or use a word processor.

Writing thank-you notes is easier than you remember them being as a kid (when your mom had you write thank you cards for every birthday gift received).

The 6 Points for a Perfect Thank You

  1. Greet the Giver

Dear Aunt Maye,

Although it’s the easy part, you’d be surprised how many people forget it.

  1. Express Your Gratitude

Thank you so much for the delicious homemade berry pie you brought to dinner the other night. 

  • Avoid beginning with, “I’m writing to thank you…” That’s stating the obvious. 
  • When thanking someone for money, use phrases like, “Thank you for your generosity,” or “Your kindness is greatly appreciated.“
  • When writing to thank someone for an intangible (such as allowing you to stay with them for a weekend), define what the intangible thing is:  ‘Thank you for your hospitality last weekend.”
  • Don’t worry if it sounds too simple; the point is to create a simple expression of a heartfelt sentiment.

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Living In Gratitude: Slow Down & Enjoy Life

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Sustained busyness is taking a toll on the quality of our lives and our relationships.

Free time. Two words that most people, including children, are unfamiliar with and wish they had more of.

Our free time has been filled with work, errands, chores, extracurricular activities, social obligations, classes, projects…the list goes on. And to top it off, we are always connected. Thanks to technology, we are reachable at all hours, wherever we are, whatever we’re doing. All of these things can lead to feeling overwhelmed, stressed and irritable.

Being ‘on‘ all of the time, always rushing from one must-do task to another negatively affects our health and wellbeing along with our productivity, creativity and ability to focus. Our relationships can also suffer as we don’t have time to communicate and connect. The good news is, you can stop the ‘hamster on a wheel‘ mentality and slow down without falling behind.

Here are ways to slow down, relax and reclaim a balanced life.

Find your sweet spot

We all get to a point when we feel overwhelmed. Instead of trying to function in that state, give yourself time to wrap your mind around the task or situation at hand. Take a short walk, sit outside in the sun, listen to your favorite soothing songs. Give yourself an opportunity to find your sweet spot’, the place where you are both relaxed and productive. When we focus on all the details that need done, we get overwhelmed. Walking away for a few minutes allows us to reset and get to a place of acting mindfully versus reacting out of anxiety and panic. Read more

Living In Gratitude: Strive To Be Of Value

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Strive not to be a success but rather to be of value. ~ Albert Einstein

In Western society, much of what defines a person, especially in their ‘career,’ is their success. And this success usually revolves around the monetary or material as well as ‘one ups-manship‘, that unspoken concept of ‘keeping up with the Joneses’.

We are taught to strive for success rather than to be of value.

When we offer value, be it to the company that employs us, our spouse, children and family or our clients and friends, we are, by default, successful. Others are innately attracted to and appreciate those who selflessly offer their help and expertise.
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Living In Gratitude: Appreciation Is Glue for Relationships

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The deepest craving of human nature is the need to be appreciated. ~William James

Psychologist John Gottman can predict with 94% certainty within 15 minutes if a couple has a solid relationship, if their relationship will fail or will result in an unhappy union.

After years of studying relationships, Gottman has discovered that happy, connected couples – those he refers to as Masters – scan social environment for things they can appreciate and say thank you. They build this culture of respect and appreciation very purposefully. Masters also express appreciation and gratitude for their significant others a minimum of 5 times each day. They find the good in their partner and express their thanks.  Read more

Living In Gratitude: Graciously Accepting Compliments

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Everyone appreciates a compliment but many of us don’t know quite how to accept them gracefully.

Compliments can make us feel uncomfortable. We don’t want to appear as though we are ‘tooting our own horn’ by accepting a compliment yet at the same time, we want to enjoy it.

Below are a few tips to graciously accepting the gift of compliments.

Compliments are gifts. 
The best response when someone compliments you is simply: Thank you.

If that doesn’t feel like enough, try to keep your response short and sincere.

“Thank you, my parents gave this to me and it’s always been one of my favorites,” or 
”Thank you, I really enjoyed presenting to your group,”
 or “Thanks so much, that means a lot to me.“

Accept All Compliment
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When we deflect or turn down a compliment, we are basically insult the giver.

Giver: I love your outfit. It was the perfect thing to wear to this event.

Receiver: Oh, this old thing? I grabbed it out of the back of my closet.  I don’t really like it, but it was too late to find something better.

That response informed the person who complemented you that they have poor taste. Now they are wondering why they offered you a compliment to begin with.

What should you have said? Thank you. Read more

Living In Gratitude: 10 Simple Ways to Practice Gratitude

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Never let the things you want make you forget the things you have. ~Unknown

Robert Emmons, noted researcher in the psychology of gratitude, was asked what were the three key things he wanted people to know about gratitude. “First, the practice of gratitude can increase happiness levels by around 25%. Second, this is not hard to achieve–a few hours writing in a gratitude journal over 3 weeks can create an effect that lasts 6 months if not more. Third, cultivating gratitude brings other health effects, such as longer and better quality sleep time.”

25% happier by practicing gratitude?  Then, a little time journaling our appreciation for long lasting effects along with better health? That’s a pretty good deal for the amount of effort.

Practicing gratitude is easy to do but can also be easy to put off. But, expressing and practicing gratitude makes a big difference in our life and the lives of others.. Get into the gratitude habit and experience the results.

What’s important is to practice on a regular basis.

Below are ten easy ways to kick it into gear and make gratitude a part of your life. Choose the ones that resonate with you and get started.

1. Put reminders (visuals) around your home. Write “Thank You” on a small river rock and before making the bed each morning, put it on your pillow. At night, as you pull back the covers, you’ll see this little rock and remember things during the day for which you are grateful. A warm comfortable bed is one of them. Posters, framed cards, or sticky notes placed in special places provide wonderful reminders. Read more

Living In Gratitude: Approve of Yourself

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I love and approve of myself. ~Daily affirmation

We all have that little voice in our head, the one that so often whispers in our ear things that chip away at our self esteem.

“You’re stupid.”

“You’re lazy.”

“You’re not good enough.”

“You’re not skinny or fit enough.”

“You’re not wealthy enough.”

These self-deprecating mantras erode our confidence. They batter the shores of our self-worth. They drag us down and hinder our motivation.

Rather than continuing to criticize ourselves, it’s time we change what that little voice is saying. By shifting our inner self-talk to one of approval, amazing things can happen. We believe in ourselves, like who we are, can forego approval by others because we already know we are okay. Read more

Living In Gratitude: 6 Ways To Celebrate World Gratitude Day

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When it comes to life, the critical thing is whether you takes things for granted or take them with gratitude. ~G.K. Chesterson

History of World Gratitude Day

The idea for an annual day of gratitude began in 1965 in Hawaii during an international Thanksgiving dinner and it has been celebrated on September 21st for the last 51 years.

Held at the East-West Center, the dinner was hosted by mediation guru, Sri Chinmoy, director of the United Nations Meditation Group. He suggested the idea as a globally unifying holiday and each person in attendance vowed to hold a gratitude gathering every September 21st in their own country.  The United Nations Meditation Group formally celebrated World Gratitude Day on September 21, 1977 at the New York Headquarters where Sri Chinmoy was honored for his work.  Since its beginnings, World Gratitude Day has been observed in numerous countries around the globe.

There has been an increasing awareness of the benefits of gratitude, appreciation and positive reflection.  World Gratitude Day is a reminder and an opportunity to reflect on all of the blessings we have in life. Expressing gratitude has been proven in numerous scientific studies to positively impact our well-being, making us happier, healthier, more social and overall more appreciative people.

World Gratitude Day 2016 is Wednesday, September 21st.

Here are six ways you can participate and contribute in this global expression of gratitude.

1. Be Courteous and Kind

Smile and say hello to people as you walk down the street or through a store or restaurant. Allow people on the roads and freeways to merge, invite that person behind you with one item to go ahead of you at the checkout counter. Read more