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Living In Gratitude: The Value of Mindfulness

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Each of us makes an experience good or bad. The action or activity is what it is. We define it by our attitude toward it.

Traffic on the highway is heavy. We get impatient and annoyed.

We don’t get a promotion at work. We are hurt or upset.

Our child didn’t get first place. We are indignant. 

Someone says something with which we disagree. We are offended.

Whatever the situation, our attitude defines that experience as either positive or negative. As humans, our inclination tends toward criticism and as such, much of our responses tend toward the negative. These less than favorable outlooks and our reactions to a situation creates tension in our bodies and mind. We have an internal dialog about how stupid, annoying, etc. it is, creating a story so immersive we distance ourselves from the actual experience.

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Living In Gratitude: When to be Grateful for Indecisiveness

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Embrace your indecisiveness because it may help you to make a good choice. ~ Karin Sieger

We’ve all encountered people (possibly even ourselves) who can’t make a decision, even about the simplest of things. The tendency to be tentative or uncertain, especially on a regular basis, can negatively impact our creativity, result in anxiety and depression, as well lead to conflict with others as they become impatient with our lack of progress.

According to UK-based psychotherapist, Karin Sieger, there are times in life when indecisiveness has an upside. This is especially true when we are going through a significant transition in life. Often we need to settle into our new normal before we implement any additional decisions.

There are many reasons for the inability to make decisions including:

  • Fear of making a mistake
  • Lack of trust in ourselves to make the right decision
  • Avoiding blame
  • Risk aversion
  • Not having the proper decision-making tools
  • Being afraid to say no and instead, taking a stance of uncertainty
  • Fear our decision may cause conflict with others
  • An inability to make commitments

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Living In Gratitude: How To Live A Fulfilled Life

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Gratitude is the single most important ingredient to living a successful and fulfilled life. ~Jack Canfield

After Steve Jobs passed away from pancreatic cancer in October 2011, there was a story circulating online that claimed to recount his final words. Though this enumeration has proven to be false, the thoughts and advice offered in Job’s fake personal eulogy offer food for thought about how to live a successful and fulfilled life. Even though he knew they were not true, Jobs’ “last words” inspired friend and billionaire Richard Branson, who posted them on his blog.

In a nutshell:

True inner happiness does not come from the material things of this world. What makes our hearts full and our lives meaningful is love, joyfulness, wonderment, gratitude, and a sense of purpose.

As we grow older, and hopefully wiser, we begin to understand that, whether we are wearing a $300 or $30 watch, they both tell the same time.

If the car we drive costs $150,000 or $30,000, we still travel the same roads and arrive at the same destination.  Read more

Living In Gratitude: Loneliness

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“We are facing a loneliness epidemic.”

According to experts, the lack of social connections could be as harmful to our health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day.

With social media and all of the connection it offers, you would think we would we all be reveling in relationships but instead, studies have shown that the more frequently we engage and use Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and other platforms, the more we tend to feel socially isolated.

This issue is especially prevalent among young adults. Their primary connections are made through technology instead of face to face. This results in a lack of meaningful and fulfilling relationships and creates social isolation rather than a sense of belonging.

In a Ted Talk that discusses the top predictors of a long life, the top two were having close relationships – people you can rely upon when things get tough – and social integration –how many people you speak to and interact with throughout your day.

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These two things far outweighed exercise, healthy eating, clean air, and a variety of other things one would think would play a major role in longevity.

To enhance not only our personal happiness as well as possibly extend our lives, it is important to cultivate meaningful relationships. This means in person. Face to face. Find people that you connect with on a deep level, that you enjoy being around and can share your innermost secrets with.

And, it is equally vital that as we move through the world, we interact with people. Smile at everyone, engage in small talk with someone in line behind you, chat with the grocery clerk, make eye contact and say hello to people you pass as you walk down the street or in the halls at work. Both of these types of interpersonal connections will do more for our personal wellbeing than any amount of social media.

There is a place for social media but we’ve replaced authentic personal bonds and social integration with interacting superficially through our smartphones. This has resulted in many of us feeling more isolated and lonely than ever.

Forget Facebook. Don’t spend another instant on Instagram. It’s time to turn off Twitter and interact with people in person.

May your day be filled with gratitude, close relationships, and good things.

Living In Gratitude: 7 Ways to Cultivate Resilience

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Life doesn’t get easier or more forgiving, we get stronger and more resilient. ~Steve Maraboli

Resilience, the ability to recover quickly from adversity, is a skill that proves its worth throughout our lives. The characteristics of this personal toughness include:

  • They practice mindfulness and purposefully pay attention to their life
  • They possess a solid self esteem
  • Recognizing that this too shall pass
  • Use past successes to confront current challenges
  • Not comparing themselves to others
  • Realizing setbacks and adversity are stepping stones to transformation
  • Finding humor in every situation
  • They relinquish control

Harnessing the capacity to recover from difficult times is critical for healthy childhood development but this characteristic is often needed most as we enter midlife. During this time, life can serve up innumerable stressors: divorce, loss of a parent, financial concerns, illness, or obstacles in our careers.

Thankfully, with the perspective gained from life experience as well as the ability to better manage emotions, those in their middle years possess characteristics and behaviors that may allow resiliency to be more easily developed. Read more

Living In Gratitude: Desiderata

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The passing of decades does not change what fundamentally makes us human, what values and attributes make us good people or the way in which we should treat one another.

The poem Desiderata by Max Ehrmann, was written in 1927. Despite being written 90 years ago, it’s words of wisdom still hold true, even in the 21st century. It reminds us to be kind, respectful, tolerant and honest, both to ourselves and to all those we encounter.

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even to the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexatious to the spirit. Read more

Living In Gratitude: 11 Steps To A Purposeful Morning

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How we begin each day can set us up for success or can set us forth on a path of feeling frustrated, anxious and stressed.

How many of us wake to an alarm to only hit the snooze button again and again? Then when we final rise, we are already behind and feeling rushed.

Others of us make a point of checking social media, again discovering that our latest post didn’t get acknowledged with likes or comments. Now, not only are we feeling rushed but unappreciated and a touch insecure. Read more

Living In Gratitude: 6 Simple Ways to Reduce Stress

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Our greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought above the other. ~Williams James

These days, we are all busy. Our days are filled with endless to do lists, both at work and at home. Being so busy, we tend to fall into the mindset that undertaking the next thing on our to-do list takes precedence over relaxing.

But it’s harder to take care of all the things we HAVE to do or for connecting with important people in our lives — if we don’t first take care of ourselves. When we take time out to relax and unwind, we will have more energy, patience and a better outlook to tackle everything we need to do.

Below are a few relaxation techniques that can help reduce stress, increase focus and calm our bodies and minds.

1.Deep Breathing

Focusing our awareness on our breath is an exceptional way in which to calm our minds and emotions, allowing us to relax. Our breathing frequently reflects our emotions. When we are stressed, angry or anxious, we tend to do shallow breathing, which perpetuates these emotional states. By bringing awareness to and altering our breathing, we can shift both our attention and mood. Read more

Living In Gratitude: Gratitude Opens Your Heart To Love

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Gratitude opens your heart to love.

Studies on gratitude show that those people who are grateful have more friends, deeper, more meaningful relationships and healthier partnerships/marriages.

Gratitude creates an amazing ripple effect in our relationships.

When we appreciate those around us, we begin to understand on a deeper level how much our friends, family and loved ones bring to our lives. Support, laughter, connection, conversation. And when we express that gratitude to each of these people, not only does our heart swell with love, but it positively affects the people for whom we are grateful. Our gratitude makes them feel loved, wanted, needed and appreciated. And when they feel all of these positive things, they in turn, ‘pay it forward’ by expressing their appreciation to the ones that love, guide, and support them.

Ways to show gratitude to the people you love:

1. Share a specific example of something they did for you and how it made a difference in your life. Read more

Living In Gratitude: 15 Ways To Live Life to the Fullest

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As you grow older, you’ll find the only things you regret are the things you didn’t do. – Zachary Scott

We only have one life to live. Below are some wise words of advice on how to make the most of each minute, each day, each year, so that we live our live to the fullest.

  1. The most important person in your life is the person who agreed to share their life with you. Treat them with the importance and appreciation they deserve.
  1. No one knows if they’ll a live a long life or a short. But either way, it pays to take care of yourself. Exercise, eat right, manage your stress, drink enough water, get 8 hours of sleep, floss your teeth. Your odds for a long, healthy life increase by doing all of these things.
  1. Stuff is just stuff. Don’t focus on acquiring material objects. Hold onto time and acquire experiences instead.

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