Did you know that sleep and rest are not the same thing? 

Many of us believe we are rested when we’ve gotten a good night’s sleep — but there are other types of rest we need and are desperately lacking. Many of us are enduring a rest deficiency because of the “constantly busy” culture that makes us believe we have to produce and achieve 24/7. Downtime of any sort isn’t “socially” acceptable. And if we do take time to truly rest and relax, we often are left feeling guilty.

The result? A whole lot of constantly tired and chronically burned-out people. 

Our society doesn’t realize and recognize the power of rest. Rest is about rejuvenation, not just sleep.

 An article on Ideas.Ted.com discussed the seven essential types of rest that every one of us requires.

Physical rest

This is the rest that immediately comes to mind, but it entails more than sleeping. Physical rest has two components. The first is passive, such as when we are sleeping or taking a nap. Active physical rest are times we engage in restorative practices such as yoga, getting a massage, or taking a leisurely walk. These activities improve flexibility and circulation.

The human brain has a systematic process to assess information rapidly. Part of this includes taking in and immediately evaluating details presented to us. Most of the time, this data input is so fast that we don’t recognize that we are forming opinions and making snap judgments.

Every single day, we judge situations and people. We make assumptions and, dare we admit, jump to conclusions.

Having compassion for ourselves and others evokes a different response. Compassion requires awareness of our judgmental thoughts and preconceived ideas. It asks for genuine concern and empathy for the plight of others.

We’ve all had someone say something that hurt our feelings and we have probably done the same to others.

We have all encountered people acting out inappropriately, either in a personal or professional setting, and some of those individuals never apologized.

Or maybe they said they were sorry but you could tell they really didn’t mean it or their apology was filled with explanations that offered excuses for their behavior.

We are all human and we all make mistakes. Apologizing when we hurt someone else intentionally or unintentionally is a vital skill. 

Apologizing is hard. Admitting we were wrong is hard. Taking responsibility for hurting someone else is hard. Being vulnerable is hard.

But it is also a powerful reconnector.

Our days are filled with noise. 

Talking. Television. Traffic. Alarms. Phones. Texts. Music. Sirens. Barking dogs. Loud noise. Background noise. We are so accustomed to noise that some of us even need the whir of a fan or a white noise machine to help us sleep.

Noise is all around us, all the time. So much so that when its truly quiet, it is almost unnerving.

There’s been much research around how loud noises are harmful to hearing as well as how noise serves to disrupt focus and productivity, decrease our ability to solve problems, and results in reduced recall in both adults and children.

But there are also studies that indicate just how vital silence is to our brains.

As we enter into a new year and a new decade, consider this analogy for what lies ahead.

You are holding a cup of coffee when someone bumps into you, causing the coffee to spill.

Why did the coffee spill?

Many of us would respond, “Because someone bumped into me.”

The answer is: Because there was coffee in your cup.

The New Year symbolizes a fresh start, with many people making resolutions. Often these are things like losing weight, getting fit or eating healthier. These are all great resolutions, but we wanted to pose ten other possibilities that can make an enormous impact on your wellbeing, relationships, career and overall happiness.

Here is a list of ten things to quit in the year ahead. Whether you pick one or work on all of them, these are resolutions that will make life so much better. 

1.Trying to please everyone

2. Fearing change

“Let go. You may not know what comes next but know that whatever it is…you will be okay.” -Unknown

Limbo is uncomfortable. It is that awkward state of “in between,” the place set smack in the middle of where you are and where you will be.

Whatever the reason for it, limbo finds all of us at various times in life. This in between state of being, especially if it lingers, can foster frustration, uncertainty, worry, stress, anxiety, fear, and a lack of fulfillment.

From limbo often sprout thoughts of, “What’s the point?” and “Why bother?” We put our life on hold in anticipation of the impending change whose occurrence and timeframe are ethereal.

When we are in limbo, opportunities go unclaimed.

Relationships go undiscovered or sometimes unnurtured.

Adventure and happiness may slip by.

All in anticipation of waiting for that something to happen “soon.”

We’ve all been there. And it can be hard to let go and know that whatever happens, we will be okay.

Although limbo is something most of us will face in life, that doesn’t mean it has to consume us. We can make a conscious decision to stop being fearful of what we can’t control. We can stop listening to that niggling negative voice in our head, stop feeding our worry, halt conjuring up worst case scenarios that will most likely never come true.

Written by guest blogger, Gowtham Natarajan

As you stroll down the busy hallway at school during lunch with a group of friends, you look over and see a kid eating lunch by himself. But what do you do next?  

Do you keep walking thinking he chose to sit there? 

Go over to him and ask if he has anyone to spend his thirty-minute lunch break with? 

Offer to have him eat with you and your friends? 

This is probably a situation that many of us have encountered at one point or another. The question is, however, what did you do about it?

An article authored by Arjun Walla shared some interesting scientific information backing what we always knew: gratitude literally impacts us on a molecular level.

According to the article, scientists have discovered that feelings of gratitude can actually change your heart and brain. Feeling gratitude can also be a great tool for overcoming depression and anxiety. Furthermore, scientists have discovered that the heart sends signals to the brain.

There are those people with seemingly very little who are overwhelmed with gratitude for a warm meal, rudimentary shelter, or some used clothing while so many of us who have all so much are always in search of more things to make us happy and fulfilled rather than appreciating what we have.

In a world where emotional intelligence isn’t really taught in school and the importance is put on striving for high grades, it’s no wonder so many people have difficulty feeling grateful. This is especially understandable if you’ve been brought up in the western world, which is full of consumerism and competition, a world where we’re constantly made to feel we are lacking so we need to strive for more.

Says Walla, happiness is a matter of perspective, and in a world where we are constantly made to feel like we are lacking and always ‘wanting’ more, it can be difficult to achieve or experience actual happiness. Many of us are always looking toward external factors to experience joy and happiness when really it’s all related to internal work. This is something science is just starting to grasp as well, as shown by research coming out of UCLA’s Mindfulness Awareness Research Center (MARC).

Vulnerability is defined as “uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure.” And many of us have been taught to believe that being vulnerable is a sign of weakness. To protect ourselves against the perils of vulnerability, we employ emotional armor, which guards us against shame, hurt, scarcity, fear, and anxiety.  

But in her book, Daring Greatly, Brené Brown explains that vulnerability is a sign of courage and serves as the “birthplace of love, belonging, and joy.”

“Yes, being vulnerable is scary and yes, we’re open to being hurt, but can you imagine your life without loving or being loved?” asks Brown.

The very nature of love means opening ourselves to being vulnerable. With love comes the potential for hurt, grief, and loss. But a life without love is lonely, empty, and unfulfilling so we take the risk to love and be loved.